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LORELAI: You, of all people, should know the dangers of the Founder's Day punch. Did you learn nothing from Mommy's Coyote Ugly bar dance at last year's Salute to the Quakers festival?
RORY: Oh no, you can't blame that all on the punch.

RORY: So the Swedish flight attendants should be here any minute.
LOGAN: I swear this situation has never happened to me before in my life.

LORELAI: The ducks will be fine. They're lying in a pan with their heads chopped off, so the worst part is behind them.

LOGAN: How's that headache of yours?
RORY: Subsiding a little. The mashed potato, mac and cheese, biscuit, gravy plate combo really helped a lot.
LOGAN: I have to say, half the fun in being with you is the horrified looks on the waiters' faces.

PARIS: Sick people freak me out.
DOYLE: You're pre-med!

LORELAI: You know, I love watching you cook. It's hot.
LUKE: That's because you're standing right next to the broiler.
LORELAI: Oh, is that what we're calling it now?
LUKE: Not in front of the guys, please.
LORELAI: Fine. I'll save my dirty cooking jokes for later.

PARIS: A commitment? With Logan?
RORY: Yep.
PARIS: I don't believe it! You did it, you landed the whale. You're Annette Bening.
RORY: I'm not Annette Bening. It was just a matter of getting him to focus on the situation.

RORY: Hm. Remind me to tell you about the time my mother wore a shirt with a rhinestone penis on it and my grandma had her car towed.

RORY: I had a coming out party! I went to Chilton, and Yale, and why are they okay with Josh? I mean, he doesn't even say anything! At least I noticed the Velazquez!
LOGAN: Josh isn't marrying the heir to the Huntzberger fortune, you are.

LORELAI: Aw. You were one hell of a white knight today, baby.
LUKE: Yes, I'm a regular Lancelot.
LORELAI: You're starting to snooze.

RORY: Well, to make a long story short, Logan's family hates me.
LORELAI: That's impossible. It's like hating Thumper. No one hates Thumper.

PARIS: He finally admitted, once his cough started coming back, that what we have he no longer views as casual. He said we are officially in a committed -
RORY: Hey, I know that word!
PARIS: - Relationship, and I would not be remotely out of line if I called myself his girlfriend. And then I handed him the Nyquil, and then he passed out.
RORY: Very romantic.
PARIS: I know.

MITCHUM: Say the only reason I offered this to you is because my family behaved badly and I wanted to make up for it. Say I have no interest in furthering your career. This is still an opportunity. Who cares why you got the opportunity? It's here, and life is about making the most of everything you're handed. Well, this is being handed to you. Now, what are you going to do about it?